Chile and Ensalada

Herrow! It's time for another update!

We had our second round of Taxotere yesterday, and mommy doesn't seem to be experiencing any extreme symptoms so far. Please pray that she will be completely side effect free! Unfortunately, the new chemo doesn't seem to be working, as mommy continues to cough almost continuously throughout the day. So please pray that the chemo will improve mommy's condition drastically.

She's lost almost all her hair, so we are in search of soft hats and scarves to cover her head. If you happen to know where we can find such hats, please pass on the info. We are driving to the Stanford Cancer center tomorrow afternoon to pick a wig for her, so please pray that we will have a good time and that we will find the perfect hairpiece for her! We also attended a lung cancer support group at the same center last Wednesday, and we met many non-smoking lung cancer patients. Please pray that she will find a way to communicate with the other patients even though she doesn't speak fluent english and that it will be an uplifting and supportive place for her.

We have already switched doctors once, but we are considering switching to UCSF's lung specialist Dr Jahan. We will need to send in her medical records and wait for him to review her case before we can began the switching process. Please pray that God will lead us to the right decision and that we can be at peace with the outcome.

Lastly, please pray for me. I am very sick, so on top of not being able to take care of mommy, I am exposing her to extra germs in her most critical period.

Thank you! And if you are wondering about the title, ask Katie Low about it!

Tomorrow is a big day

because mommy is starting a new chemo drug. After 16 rounds of carbo/gemzar and gemzar alone, the cancer has become resistant the combination, so we are turning to our second line treatment. Unlike the previous treatments which had no side effects, Taxotere will be harder on her body and is likely to cause hair loss and swelling, so we are trying to prepare mommy for it. I can't imagine how scared she must be to actually experience and see the effects of chemo on herself, and I'm afraid that she will lose hope. Please keep us in your prayers!

Prayer requests:
-Please pray that Taxotere will be amazingly effective, and that God will use it to destroy every trace of cancer in mommy's body.
-Please pray that side effects will be minimal, barely noticeable. Please ask God to protect mommy from the side effects that may come. Pray that He will keep her physically safe and strong.
-Please pray that Mommy will remain joyful and hopeful, even as she experiences hair loss and any other side effects. Please ask God to help us cope with the physical changes and support mommy through these difficult times.
-Please pray that we will be reminded of His sovereignty over my mommy's life. Lord, please wrap the tam family, especially mommy, in the warmest, tighest hug.
-Last, please pray that God will shower us, especially mommy, with His mercy, love, and grace every single moment, and that His power will be so evident that we will feel His presence every second of every day.

Thank you!

Silly

Mommy wanted to go to bed, but I convinced her to stay with me while I studied, so she sat across from me at the kitchen table, turned on her laptop, closed her eyes, and fell asleep sitting up.

Storytelling

This morning, instead of doing my morning cleanup routine, I hopped into my mommy's bed. For the next hour, she told me stories about my dad and about her favorite dogs at the park. I learned that my mom first noticed my dad when he helped her best friend move furniture into a new apartment and fell in love with him because she saw how kindhearted and compassionate he was. I also learned that my mom loves dogs, but only from afar. Her favorite dog is a prejudiced, little pomeranian named Baby, who refuses the advances of another dog, Bobo, because she only likes dogs of her own kind. Mommy also believes that Baby may be lesbian because she won't mate with any boys, even those in her own breed.

And to tie the two subjects together, we decided that my dad is very much like a dog because he is very loyal and loving but sometimes a little clueless and maybe a little prejudiced.

There is really nowhere else I would rather be than in my mommy's bed, with unwashed faces, snuggling and telling stories till noon.

We met with Dr. Tuan this morning to discuss the CT scan results. Unfortunately, mommy's tumors have double and some tripled in size, and new ones have appeared. Dr. Tuan recommended that we try our first line treatment again, the carbo/gemzar combo, and taxotere later if the carbo/gemzar is ineffective. We will begin again in two weeks, and during this short time, her cancer may continue to multiply.

Tonight, I decided to compare past CT scans and x-rays to our most recent ones, and I found that most of the tumors have regrown to their original size. In just two months, my mom's condition has regressed to how it was pre-treatment. I want to stay hopeful, but this cancer seems so much more powerful than me, my mom, and our family.

M.I.A

There's just so much to do and not enough hours in a day! I will post a longer, more robust(I really wanted to use this word. Forgive me if it's not used correctly) update soon. For now, please pray for tomorrow's CT scan results. We hope that the scans will show continued improvement so that we can continue with her current treatment. Please also pray that any radiation mommy is exposed to will just pass through her body harmlessly. She's had at least six CT scans, two PET scans, and countless x-rays in the past six months, and I am very, very worried about her body. Also pray for Mr. Tam, as he is mentally and physically tired from worry. Sorry for the short blog, but I promise to write a more detailed one soon. Have a blessed night!

Waiting

We met with Dr. Tuan last Tuesday to discuss the PET scan results and treatment options. I meant to actually scan a copy of the actual scan results, but I am lazy. Maybe next time! The scan results showed that there is no spread (Hallelujah!) and that she has improved vastly compared to the last one done in April. The spot that spread to her bone disappeared completely, along with many other small spots, and her largest tumor is about half the size of how it was before we began treatment. This is all great news, but unfortunately, these results can only be compared to her last PET scan, which was taken before we even began treatment, so we are not getting the most accurate assessment. To get a real comparison, we would need to get a CT scan, which is scheduled to take place six weeks later.

I really want to take the CT scan sooner than later because mommy is coughing A LOT more than before. I am afraid it is a sign that her tumors are growing again. Please pray for her cough and the tumors to go away. What if we made the wrong decision? Doesn't it make sense to continue treatment if it has been so effective so far? My heart breaks every time I hear her cough, and it's getting progressively worse everyday. This must be the scariest part, when all we an do is wait for the next CT scan, when we really can't actively fight the cancer.

My dad has also started coughing recently, and we're trying to convince him to get an x-ray, but he keeps avoiding the subject. Will you please pray that he will take the chest x-ray and that the results will be good?

She's coughing again. ): Please keep us in your prayers.