Sunday, May 23, 2010

Good Morning!

I wanted to load pictures of mommy, but I can't find any memory card slots. Do laptops have them?

Anyhoooo... I just wanted to tell you guys about some joyous moments we've shared in the past few days.

Three mornings ago, I was awoken early by the sound of a woman singing. In my sleepiness, I couldn't recognize the voice, but I listened for a couple more minutes and heard "yeh soh," Jesus in cantonese. after a bit of processing, I realized it was mommy tam belting out a song about Jesus! what a beeaauuutttiiifffuuulll way to start the day! I wish I recorded it so I could share it with you guys.

Another chemo session at 8am this morn. We entered the office quite worried because my mom has been coughing up blood again, but we were ecstatic to find that my mom's largest tumor shrank from 7.3 cm to 4.something cm. We knew there was some improvement but never expected such drastic shrinkage! Thank you so so much, Jesus!

Last week, I asked Dr. Knopf agreed to increase her drug dosage, so this week, mommy had two hundred more milliliters of gemzar. I'm a bit worried that she may not be able to withstand the extra kick, so please pray for her white blood cells and red blood cells and physical health in general. Also, please pray that I will be more disciplined and remember to do nightly devotions with momma. I'm so laazzyyy. ):

Almost everyone is at chapter camp right now. It feels weird to not be there, but I hope and pray that you/they see God so fully, be completely tranformed, and experience a little piece of Shalom this week!

Have a wonderful day! See ya soon!

Wednesday, May 19, 2010


Another appointment with Dr. Knopf yesterday morning. He seemed to be in a rush, so we left the office a bit confused about.. everything. Some things i recall him saying are:
1) yes, we can up the dosage of gemzar
2) itchy rash can be fixed with benadryl, unless it's shingles
3) she is probably responding well to the drugs since she's stopped coughing up blood (except she did cough up blood yesterday and today)
4) go down to the first floor and get a chest x-ray

After the appointment, we met up with some friends from Hawaii for dimsum. T'was a wonderful time until my auntie told them about my mommy. I decided that i needed an escape, so J.Bear and i ran far, far away to a secret place (Sutro Baths)and hiked along the coast talking nonsense like we always do. Right as we we exited our secret place, i got a voicemail from Emily, our favorite nurse practitioner. Her message said something like, "Hi Mrs. Tam, the chest x-ray from this morning shows that your lungs are looking a little better!" yayayay! Thank you, Jesus! Every little sign of improvement is worth a whole lot of dancing and celebrating!

Also, I found out this past Sunday that mommy tam accepted Jesus Christ at a Christian event held last Friday! yayyayyayyayyay!!

Let's celebrate!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010


My mom just called to tell me that she's coughing and having trouble breathing. i want to run to her and rub her back and command her to put on more clothes and shower her with hugs and kisses and feed her medicine and pray for her


i am fifty miles away, attempting to study for a class i don't care about.
i just want to be with my mommy


Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Hello Mr. Lion


Mommy Tam had her second chemo session on Monday. We, momma and i, spent five hours total in the hospital, two hours for blood tests and the actual chemotherapy and about three hours waiting, waiting, waiting. I had to walk up the dang Washington street hill twice to move my Katie(car)! What a dreadful experience! Anyhoo, Dr. Knopf made a last minute change, switching the second drug(again!) from taxotere to gemcitabine because it's a safer and gentler drug. This means that we will be back in the office next Monday for another dosage of gem and zometa, a bone strengthening agent.

So far, mommy is fine. The first three days are actually much more enjoyable for her because the anti-nausea drug she receives along with the chemo drugs also reduces her cough. She's taken about three naps in the last 10 hours, not because she's tired but because she is bored. I'm actually a bit worried that the treatment is not working or that they mistakenly gave her salt water since she doesn't exhibit any symptoms at all! Please pray that the drugs pumping through her blood will catch all the tumor cells, phagotize them, and DDDEEESSSTTTRROOOOYYY them! I'm imagining my mom's white blood cells partnering with the chemo drugs, tagging and gobbling up the evil guys.

While this war is going on in momma's body, we are living a very peaceful, (too) quiet outside life. All we do is eat, sleep, and shop for groceries. Hopefully, she will be well enough to go places and explore. I registered for the 99.7 my mom is the bomb contest and if we win, we get two free tickets to hawaii! my mom is cute. she's walking our stuffed lion up my arm right now. Shoutout to Matt! my mom loves him! Anyways, I'm crossing my fingers hoping that that they'll choose us so we can getaway and relax and pamper to our heart's content.

About an hour ago, mommy and I opened up our handy devotion books, one copy in english and another in cantonese and went over deuteronomy 15:1-11. The passage is about debt and giving, and I had trouble explaining it to her. She had very specific scenarios for me, and my cantonese is limited, so i stumbled through it and tried to explain it to her with familiar examples. Still, at the end, I asked her if I helped any and she said "not at all." Ricky's leader is holding a quick Bible study for her tomorrow night, so hopefully she will get a clearer view of God and the Bible. Please pray for better translation and for God reveal himself to her whether through me, ricky, church ladies, or other people.

Speaking of church, mommy is going consistently to cumberland chinese presbyterian church and has met a wonderful group of ladies. Many of them are nurses and one is a cancer survivor. God knew where to take us. Thanks to Ally Lam and Mrs. Lam for that! Mommy will be going to some events and some field trips with them soon. She's found good community in the church and in cancer support groups.

One thing i've struggled with lately is that my family is no longer held together by our nightly prayers and devotion. My dad's starting to make fun of me whenever I mention praying before meals or bedtime. Mommy's happy to do these things, though I suspect she does so only to keep me from crying, but my dad's being a big meanie. Please pray that God will soften his heart and call him to him.

Wow, this post is long. Ricks and I snuck out to Best Buy's yesterday afternoon to buy my mom's mother's day present, a very high tech, pink(yuck) digital camera. We also had a billion fish tacos(HI BECKY!!) So, yea, with our new camera, we can record every adventure! sigh, I just got that sinking feeling I get everytime I think about the past or future. ):

Alright, i hear some commotion in the kitchen, which means some sort of food will appear soon! au revior, mes amies!

i miss you lots!